Tuesday, April 21, 2009.

I swear I gonna upload those pictures of my skin soon! DAM the quality wasn't that good so can't really see those blisters but you could see those shiny little spots all over.

Went to CGH again yesterday, Steph came to find me and accompany me to wait for my turn to see the doctor although she complaint a lot but still thanks! I waited almost 3 hours for my turn ok! The service is dam bloody inefficient zzz. Also she kept telling me shes the Lady Gaga in Singapore =.= and kept singing Poker Face and doing the dance moves =.=

My skin is rotting all over my body now; my ears, neck, sides of my face, arms and thighs. The skins on each places are wearing off and dropping as if I'm changing skin LOL and DAM the blisters came up again yesterday and even the doctor was quite disgusted by my skin =.= I felt so sad because my complexion was quite good till this happened, I felt as if I'm a huge reptile walking around with those rotten rough skin =(

Spent $130 on 2 ps3 games; Devil May Smile 4 and President Evil 5 =.=



If you are reading this, just to let you know that you are still on my mind.





*I'm still missing you

Sunday, April 19, 2009.

Celebrated my mum's birthday, wasn't a quite happy one for me. Theres a few factors to it but well it's ok.

Whole night I was thinking, actually you should be here celebrating my mum's birthday together with me but yet there won't be a chance anymore. I was thinking about how good would it be if you were to be here but it's ok because from your blog, I know that you are moving on well with your life even without me around though it still hurts to know that =)

Anyway got myself badly burnt by the sun and I mean SERIOUSLY BAD because now my limbs and my body is totally in different tone and the worse is that today all my skins have those little blisters on my whole arms on the pores. It looks freaking and totally feels disgusting, my skin feel like a reptile now with those protruding blisters all over my arms =.= DAM I'll upload the pictures tomorrow on the tone of my skin and the blisters on my arms. BE PREPARED TO BE DISGUSTED




*And I seriously missed you

Tuesday, April 14, 2009.

Hate to say that I miss you. I don't like the feeling that when I'm missing you yet you don't even give a dam. Why must I feel miserable and yet you are enjoying your life away. I don't like such one-sided shits. I tried hard not to think of you but still ..... DAM I HATE IT!

Ok finally few more days to working days~ Here I come, you this freaking shit gigolo club!

For all my girlfriends out there, feel free to come visit me at the gigolo club, I would definitely give you discount and get you a few handsome gigolos~ =)




*If you were to understand

Sunday, April 12, 2009.

I doubt you remember our date for this week, it's ok because it's Sunday today and tomorrow onwards I'll be back in camp and working on Thursday onwards hopefully.

I was reading through my inbox, I never bear to delete your messages and when I saw the messages from you saying that you did miss me, saying that I'm someone important to you and saying that there's a difference with me around than without me around, I was feeling very weird. When I first received them from you, I was so dam happy but now I was wondering if those words were true. I'm missing you every moment and I don't really like it, I don't wanna make myself miserable but yet still I miss you.

All I want now is just a favour from you. Can you at least tell me if those words were true rather than me figuring it out myself because it doesn't feel nice, it hurts. Thanks




*Wish you all the best

Friday, April 10, 2009.

Thanks for giving me an answer through your reply. Thanks a lot... But why does my heart ache so much...

.

Who am I to you and who you are to me, this question had never been so clear before until today, I'm just someone who passed by your life and you are just someone that messed up my life. Feelings went haywire the whole night after reading your post and made me couldn't sleep. Yea each time when I read your post, feelings will definitely go haywire but never this much before.

It's ok, don't worry I'm not blaming you, anyway how I feel doesn't concern you and you had never try to understand or know how I feel so it doesn't matter. One thing I don't even understand myself, why must I fall in love with you out of everyone else.

Gonna club hard tonight as my last expenses and gonna drown myself in the alcohol. Oh did I mention that I'm gonna work next week onwards? It will gonna be like 8am-5pm in camp and 9pm-6am working, so won't be seeing my home for 5 days a week, will be working 6 days a week. I'll try very hard not to think of you at all anyway I don't even think I would have the time or energy by then. But I guess you won't think of me even if you are free. GAMBATE SEBASTIAN~

Guess I'll be bringing my camera with me tonight, my camera gonna rust soon if I'm still not using it.





*If love doesn't exist, my life would be great